B"H
The Perfect Shul
Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, perfection is subjective and I’d venture to say it doesn’t exist. Our own values and ideas may seem logical and correct because they are indeed our own. But I have enough perspective and self-awareness to realize I may not always know best.
That being said, I strive to articulate my perception of perfection with complete awareness that referring to my views as perfection is contradictory.
I often choose to wear rose colored glasses which have the unique capacity to filter out all that is problematic and comfort me with an illusion of perfection. On other occasions I wear my Superman X-ray spectacles that give me the unique ability to see through everything. I am able to see things that I would be far better off never seeing. In truth, neither option is beneficial.
A perfect shul doesn’t require rose colored glasses, nor should it necessarily dismiss dissension. In life perfection is an illusion that one craves but never satisfies. Thus, instead of seeking perfection in an absolute sense, the perfection I seek is imperfect. I have no desire to be the shul with superlative adjectives. I don’t need to have the largest membership, the most beautiful edifice, or the most devout congregants. I don’t need to be the best rabbi (I can’t help that), have the greatest Chazan, or a beautiful liturgical choir.
I embrace the simple goal of mutual respect and harmony. I don’t expect everyone to be clones and have the same mindset; what I desire is that regardless of one’s beliefs they respect the integrity of their shul. Unfortunately, Covid has changed the Jewish world. A conservative congregation in Boca now has a Zoom Membership alternative that allows you to be a member provided you never walk into shul. (Yes, strange but true.) The Boca Raton Synagogue, which for years succeeded in keeping diverse groups content by offering multiple options for services, has seen numerous breakaway shuls being established in their proximity. The divisiveness regarding Covid restrictions has managed to create a rift that opened the floodgates of acrimony and division.
A perfect shul has to have a long term vision but that vision must not alienate its long term members. A few years ago I met a prospective member who told me he was interested in purchasing a multi-million dollar home in proximity to the shul and that he had numerous friends who would purchase there, as well. He told me it would be great for the shul as it would change its character and increase membership. However, he told me he wouldn’t consider relocating unless we changed our Mechitza which he deemed too see-through for him and his neighbors. I thanked him profusely and explained that I wasn’t interested in accommodating him or his friends. I told him that we would love to have more members who embrace who we are and what we have to offer, but I have no desire to build our future by abandoning our past.
This week’s Torah portion has two amazing insights. It says tzedek tzedek tirdof, that justice should be pursued. However, it repeats the word tzedek or justice twice. One reason given is that no one should ever think that justice is limited to one approach. There are multiple approaches to justice and truth. A perfect shul should not dismiss a dissenting viewpoint but should never consider abandoning its path due to a dissenting view. And that brings us to a second very important verse: Al pi Hatorah Asher Yorucha ……. Lo tasur min hadavar….. You shall act in accordance with the instructions given to you and the ruling handed down to you, and you must not deviate from the verdict that they announce to you either to the right or to the left. Although this biblical concept may be fraught with difficulties it is nonetheless fundamental for the cohesiveness of society. If each individual would follow the dictates of their heart and not be bound by authority, chaos would reign. A shul is a microcosm of this broader society and also requires those who choose to belong to the society to accept its dictates. This doesn’t negate each individual's personal views but rather it prioritizes subservience over personal ideals. It serves to create a climate of respect,harmony, and inclusion rather than absoluteness.
I don’t need my wife to tell me that I’m not perfect, I’m well aware of this fact without any assistance. It’s less than five weeks until Rosh Hashanah and I certainly look forward to the New Year as a time for rebalancing our lives. I have been at Anshei Emuna for fifteen years and am optimistic for our future but I’m also aware that Rome may not have been built in a day but it was probably destroyed in little more than that. To build a community shul requires a community but only a few individuals are capable of destroying one.
Our shul should be perceived as perfect by those who attend and should not be compared or likened to other shuls. A shul should be akin to our children. My children are perfect because they were created by my wife and me. Therefore, trading them in for another model is out of the question. (Well, I did consider it when they were teenagers.) Parents see their children as the best because they are theirs. A perfect shul is one that is created by perfect members. For better or worse, I have no interest in being anyone else other than myself just as I have no interest in my shul being anything other than my shul. For my shul to be perfect it doesn’t require the stamp of approval by anyone other than its own people.
On Rosh Hashanah we beseech the Almighty that he remembers us as his children. We hope that he sees in us the perfection of his creation even if sometimes his creations lack that same confidence. We ask that our flaws be considered merits because that is how a creator must perceive his creations. So if you really want to have a perfect shul, the solution lies in your perception. As Herz’l said “im tirzu ain zu aggada” - if you will it, it is no dream. If we want a perfect shul, then it behooves us to see our shul as perfect.
Rabbi Jack Engel
PS: For those who are wondering, yes, I’m on a plane.
