B"H
The End is Near
Don’t worry, I’m not a fatalist prophesying a doomsday scenario. Nor am I a political analyst injecting my dire warning concerning the latest conspiracy theory. On the contrary, I’m optimistic about the future. I’m excited that the pandemic should soon be waning and we will then start returning to relative normalcy. I have confidence the Biden presidency will help bring stability to a polarized nation and that the United States will continue its genuine friendship and support of the State of Israel. I also believe it’s incumbent upon Jews to pray for the welfare and success of their government regardless of which party holds power.
Now that I can see light at the end of the tunnel it is time to critique our actions as a community. Thank God, very few of our members suffered from the ravages of the pandemic and in hindsight the early closure of our campus was completely justified. Many are jubilant and excited as they anticipate returning to shul after this prolonged absence. Others, however, are having a difficult time reconnecting. The isolation from friends mixed with prolonged loneliness is causing severe anxiety. I’ve seen some people who are gung-ho about resuming their life and others who are fearful and reluctant to take that leap of faith. Without having any divine knowledge we have to respect and honor both positions.
Unfortunately, it appears that relationships, both intimate and platonic, have been suffering as a result of the pandemic. Numerous studies during the pandemic have shown a spike in divorces in the United States, China, and Sweden. Relationship experts warn the pandemic-induced break-up curve may not have peaked yet. While common sense would suggest that people who are isolated for a prolonged period would crave friendship and camaraderie, it also seems that the experience of quarantining with family has stressed some of these relationships. Sadly, this syndrome is not limited to marital discord but is impacting on all sorts of relationships. It appears there has been a downward shift in civility and serious cracks are forming in society’s foundation.
Time will only tell if it’s too late to mitigate the damages. Child abuse is rampant and suicides are on the increase. Friendships that have stood the test of time are crumbling and open and honest communication that is paramount to civility is often lacking. Even in synagogues and houses of worship dissension is on the rise. People who previously considered themselves a homogeneous group with collective ideals and collaborations are splintering into rival factions.
In Pirkei Avot - Ethics of our Fathers - it states “Kol machloket shehi l’shem shamayim, sofo l’hitkayem - all arguments that are for the sake of heaven will endure.” What benefit is there if the argument endures? Surely it would be far better if they could find consensus and no longer argue? Perhaps the Talmudic sages were elucidating how to know for certain if an argument is for the sake of heaven. If regardless of a disagreement their friendship endures, that is the indication that the argument itself was motivated by a purity of intention. If, however, an argument leads to a cessation of the friendship, more than likely the argument wasn’t entirely for the sake of heaven.
I know it may be difficult to imagine, but many people vehemently disagree with ideas that I bring forth in my classes or write in my articles. I have been accused of being a bleeding heart liberal by those on the right and conversely a radical right wing fundamentalist by those on the left. And to be truthful, condemnation stings momentarily; it makes me question why I do what I do. Immediately after a rather sharp rebuke I may contemplate my future. However, after a few minutes (sometimes it takes a bit longer) I reassess the criticism. If indeed their friendship endures I accept the criticism as being sincere. If, however, they sever their relationship with me, I realize the friendship in its inception was not a genuine one.
A rather telling biblical narrative may help navigate the complexities of this sort of experience. The Jews were held in labor camps in subhuman conditions. Pharaoh didn’t act alone; all Egyptians supported him and oppressed the Jewish slaves. This is clearly indicated when the Torah states, “God hardened the heart of Pharaoh and all his servants” (all those who were subservient to him). After suffering from the ravages of hunger, forced labor, and servitude, one could only imagine the resentment and hostility the Israelites had towards their oppressors. Yet the Torah states, “Tell the people to borrow, each man from his FRIEND and each woman from hers, objects of silver and gold.”
Really? Were the Egyptians who they were borrowing from truly friends? Can you imagine calling yesterday’s oppressor your friend? However, once upon a time they were indeed friends. Years earlier those same Egyptian families invited them to share in the vast wealth of Egypt. They opened their country and welcomed Jacob and his family. Yes, Hashem clearly and unequivocally charges his nation to stand tall and overcome their differences. He is not excusing the hostility and oppression, rather he is saying there comes a time when focusing on the negativity is counter productive. It's time to embrace a Godly theology that expects us to change our relationship by turning our enemy into our friend. If we can be expected to love our enemy, how difficult can it be to once again love our friends?
Often when People express themselves, their words and expressions can be interpreted in multiple different ways. Was your initial thoughts after reading the title of this article upbeat? Did you interpret the words ‘the end is near’ to mean that we are about to turn a corner; that life is about to change for the better? Or was your perception of the title more morose; anticipating an article focusing on doom and gloom? There is no correct answer as both possibilities are potentially correct.
It’s just that given a choice I would rather put on a pair of rose colored glasses. I would rather see the world through optimism and hope albeit cognizant than on a few occasions I may be wrong. I’m not naive nor do I live in an altered state of reality. On the contrary, I consciously decided that ‘the end is near’ ibest understood through the Beatles song - “all my troubles seem so far away.”
Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Jack Engel
